A tribute to all those that have grown the mo for Movember. Gentlemen, I congratulate you.
A personal statement to prune and to clip
A curious growth on a chap’s upper lip
A thistly bristle to pucker the mistle
Or flyaway thing of the fluffiest fluff
Taken with snuff, worn in the buff
Mate to the beard, friend to the muff
Infusing the face with a masculine air
In filling a gap when a chaps lost his hair
Historically grown by the gayest Hussar
Mexican bandit and Swedish porn star
Subversively worn by the mauve intellectual
A badge of the biker and butch homosexual
Imperial, lampshade, toothbrush Sanchez
‘Neath bowler or beret or turban or a fez
The Christian the Muslim the Hindu the Jew
Yes a mans got to do what a mans got to do
Even agnostics and Gnostics agree
That it’s healthy to cultivate topiary
To be proving that most men are all really the same.
And the bro with the mo isn’t really to blame
So lets cast of the past of mustachio shame
And jump on the train and unskew the frame
And re light the flame to proclaim our aim
To reclaim the humble moustache from the:
Serial killers, bent coppers,
Rogue hairdressers,
Pimps and second hand car salesmen,
Malevolent public servants,
Despots and dictators and
Suspect window cleaners,
And shady science teachers
That have given the tashe such a terrible name.
So let’s sprout em with vigour oer grimace and pout
Add weight to the boat race and take up the shout:
'Moustaches, tush-tashes, his-‘tashes, your-‘tashes,
Our-‘tashes, their-‘tashes, please-‘tashes, more-‘tashes
More mo, more mo.
Up, up and away we go
On with the show for the bro with the mo.
Let us grow, let us grow, grow the mo!